The Gap

So this past week I realized something very important- I'll never be able to understand this culture. I was talking with my friend Emma and I don't remember what we were talking about but he said "you aren't African." And it all of a sudden hit me, I AM NOT African- no matter how much my friends told me I needed to live in Africa, no matter how much I want to be African and understand their culture, their lifestyle, their language, I will never be African. I come home to what I call my "little America". I live in a house, I am surrounded by my teammates, I have running water, I eat my American food, I have American clothes (I wear shorts around the house- totally scandolous here with the older generation of Africans), I buy seasonings, I cook stuff in the oven, I am not African.



If I want to be African, I need to eat Matoke as my main dish (tastes basically like potatoes), I would get water from a faucet in the community, I might not have a door which means things easily get stolen (our gaurd and his roommates just got all their stuff stolen from them- this is the second time it's happened within a month's time period), I would eat at 2:00 and 9:00 for lunch and dinner, I might only own one pair of flip flops, I most likely wouldn't own my own car, I would wear skirts mostly all the time, if I worked (that's IF I worked) I would get paid DAILY and not hourly, it would be a sacrifice for me to go to church, I might not have enough money to take my baby to the doctor (Diana's baby Rina is sick and they can't figure out what is wrong with her, please pray for her as we figure out what is going on with her, we may have to take her to the doctor soon), I would probably know at least 3 languages, I wouldn't get burned by the sun whenever I went out, and I would have known to not ever think about wanting to ride a bike. (the myth here is that women will lose their virginity if they ride a bike)

So, in a way, I could be discouraged that I can never fully understand their culture, their lifestyle, and their worldview. I call this the "Gap".


This Gap is kind of frustrating because, well, it just gets in the way of you really understanding how you are making a difference, how you will be able to help the needs these people have, and it blocks your own ability to be able to gauge what steps you need to do next sometimes. But the Lord has really been showing me, I don't need to fill or figure out that Gap. All I need to do is be obedient to Him, work in the things He has given me, and even though I may not see the impact, know that He is doing what He set out for me to do. Only the Holy Spirit can do something like fill a Gap that I am not able to see, to measure, to understand. Basically, as Jana said, I'm totally inadequate, but the same God who is at work in America is the same God who is at work in Africa- it just may look different than what I'm expecting. So, I'm just giving up my own understanding in order to follow the Holy Spirit wherever He will lead- and He will fill the Gap, and do the ministry, and make the work fruitful, and in the end I will only be able to boast in Christ because I will know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, it was only Him that was doing the work.